How to overcome low self-esteem
The way we see ourselves, judge ourselves determines our self-esteem. People with good self-esteem are happier compared to people with a poor self-esteem. What exactly sets these two types of people apart? Is it their successful lives or achievements that give them a positive self-image? But then aren’t these things by-products of a healthy self-esteem?
You might think, “I could have a successful career, too, had I little confidence in myself” or “I could grab that opportunity too had I seen myself worthy enough” but you think that you “suck”. The truth is everybody sucks, but they are still doing fine!
“Why?”, you would ask. The answer is, they accept themselves as who they are, embracing their strengths and accepting their weaknesses- that’s where the difference lies.
Having a good self-esteem is not an easy task, but it’s not impossible, either. The first step to overcome any problem is to be willing to overcome that problem. And if you are reading this article, then you already have the will, so, let’s move on to the steps!
8 Tips to Overcome Low Self-Esteem-
1.Find the Cause
To fix a leakage in a pipe, you gotta find the “source” of the leakage. Same with your esteem issues, you have to find the reason of it. Is it because of abuse- physical, emotional or sexual? Or is it because of an illness? The reason could be a failed career or a failed relationship. These reasons result in a low self-belief which makes it difficult for you to live your life to the fullest. Finding the reason can help to challenge your issues.
2. Have Faith in Yourself
You may feel a strong dislike for yourself, feeling unworthy and undeserving of happiness when you have a low self-esteem. You may think you are incapable of doing things and blame yourself for things you aren’t even responsible for. It’s hard, but have a little faith in yourself. Know that you are capable of doing anything you want to do and you deserve the happiness you crave for.
3. Note Down Your Strengths and Weaknesses
Remember what people with good self-esteem do? They embrace their strengths and accept their weaknesses. That’s what you are going to do now. Get a paper, draw a line in the middle and start writing down your 10 Strengths and 10 Weaknesses. It might be difficult at first to come up with your strengths if you have a low self-worth but it’s fine, you can ask your friends and loved ones to help you out. This list will you find out the things in which you don’t suck at and give a direction in improving yourself.
4. Don’t Live in the Past
Your low self-esteem might not be only because of your comparison with others but with your old-self, too. Maybe you used to be a good artist when you were younger and now you are terrible at art or, maybe you used to be pretty smart, but no longer. It is of no use to sulk about it- your old-self doesn’t exist anymore. Adjust your self-image to match your present-self and evaluate yourself according to what you are capable of doing now!
5. Avoid Negative Self-Talk
There is this inner critical voice inside your head that makes you doubt your capabilities, your decisions. You need to set yourself free out of its control. This is the voice that tells you that you are not good enough, that you can’t read a paragraph without mispronouncing a word, that you can’t walk without falling or that you can’t make friends because nobody likes you. Hush it down! Grab a notebook, note down what this nasty voice says and next write a line complete opposite of it. Does it say that you are not worthy of any love? Write down that you deserve love as much as anybody does!
6. Be assertive
You do almost *anything* to please the people around you just so they would accept you. You take the responsibility for their mistakes, do things you don’t want to do but they want- it’s all because of your low confidence. Be assertive! Set your boundaries and learn to say no. If you will not respect yourself, nobody will.
7. Acknowledge Your Accomplishments
Stop dwelling on your mistakes and learn to acknowledge your accomplishments. Don’t belittle your achievements by devaluing them. Instead, celebrate your successes, even the small ones. Start accepting compliments, believe people when they say that you are good at something!
8. Set Challenges
Set challenges for yourself to overcome your fears of not being good enough. You don’t have to have any high expectation- set small goals, achieve them and feel positive about yourself. You might refrain from doing something when you worry about what other people may think. Trying a simple recipe or learning a new language during weekends can give you a big boost in your esteem. The key is to enjoy whatever you do and not to worry about being perfect.